It’s no secret to how I parent.
Each day is a new day that I get to wake up and admit to God I really need His help because I don’t know what I am doing.
I pray this constantly. Everyday. I am nothing. But with God, I am everything He needs me to be.
So it’s no shocker in a moment conversing with my daughter I heard His voice - “look at her”.
In a moment where my daughter was at the table asking me questions as I was emptying the dishwasher, she said “Mommy I love you.” And before I could answer and respond back, God told me to “look at her.” The voice was clear as someone physically there speaking to me.
I could have easily said the words “I love you too” with my head buried in the dishes but God told me to “look at her” and respond.
As I stopped clearing the dishes out the dishwasher, I looked up to my darling daughter at the table and smiled, “I love you too girlfriend!” And I went back to clearing the dishes. She smiles in her most cheesy grin and continued talking.
I can’t tell why at that moment I needed to look up and respond. Only God knows that. I’m sure I’ve said “I love you” preoccupied with work or other things - but this time God told me to “look at her.”
I believe this is how intentional He wants to be in our lives. The smallest look could have made all the difference to her that day. And opening myself up that morning to let God unto my steps, my life, my home - I believe He ordered me to that very moment to have an intentional moment with my daughter.
The Holy Spirit wants to help us become better parents. The small voice that tells us to “put down our phones” or “give him a big hig” or even “apologize to her” helps us set examples in love for our children. Bishop TD Jakes in a recent sermon provided a little conviction to me. He said that “Parents must teach the things about God at home if they expect the church to. For if they come to church, get it at church but don’t get it at home, it provides confusion for the child.” And as a believer, the Bible provides important instructions:
Proverbs 22:6 “Parents train a child in the way he should go and when he gets old he will not depart from it.”
How can we train a child in the way they should go when we don’t know ourselves, as parents, how they should go?
By simply inviting Jesus into your life and allowing Him to abide in you. When He is in you, He comes out of you through actions and words and even with little gentle reminders to “speak softly” and “don’t yell” or “don’t hit”.
I haven’t read the “perfect parenting” book because there is no such thing as a perfect parent. But with the Holy Spirit on my side, I have a safe chance of parenting my child to prepare her for her specific purpose and destiny.